Andy Wasif. Red Sox Fans Are from Mars, Yankees Fans Are from Uranus. Triumph, 2010.

There are two ways people pronounce the planet Uranus in English. This book clearly wants us to pronounce it with the accent on the second syllable.

This is written by a Red Sox fan, but it honestly and humorously is meant for both Yankees and Red Sox fans. It has many little stories that make fans of both teams sometimes look good and sometimes look ridiculous.

Fans may recall that a few years before 2004, when things did change some, mocking Yankees fans would chant “1918!”, reminding the Red Sox and their fans the last time the Red Sox won the World Series.

Wasif tells about a friend who was a die-hard Red Sox fan and now lives in Southern California. He was wearing his Red Sox cap. However, it was the winter of 2004-2005, after the Red Sox had beaten the Yankees in the playoffs and swept the World Series. The 1918 chant was outdated. Wasif and his friend were eating in a diner near his California home, and his friend heard someone say “1918!” He got furious, tipped over his table and started yelling at the person. Someone called the police. The young, terrified waitress had tried to tell him that his bill came to nineteen dollars and eighteen cents!

Clearly, there can be problems with fans who take taunts too seriously. The stated goal of Red Sox Fans Are from Mars, Yankees Fans Are from Uranus is to cool things down, to bring some understanding to both sides.

The author presents himself (tongue-in-cheek, of course) as a counselor for members of both fan bases. The Red Sox fans he calls Martians; Yankees fans, Uranians. Much of the book is an attempt to reconcile the two sides—not to get anyone to change his or her allegiance, but to understand them. As he puts it, love your enemies.

The root personality trait that bothers other fans about Red Sox fans is fear. With nearly a century of close calls and near misses, there has developed a sense of doom, that the other shoe will drop. There is also a sense not so much that the Yankees are their rival, but that the Yankees are the bully who picks on them, and every other team and fan base in the American League.

The root personality trait that bothers other fans about Yankees fans is the arrogance or sense of entitlement. “Hey, they’re the Yankees. What else can be said?” I recall during the 2004 ALCS, which the Red Sox won after losing the first three games to the Yankees, Yogi Berra told a current Yankee not to worry, after all, he told him, they were the Red Sox. He snickered, but that time the Sox had the last laugh (finally!).

He tells Red Sox fans who go to Yankee Stadium to show respect. That means paying the $7.00 required for checking a bag at the Stadium. The book came out in 2010, but it looks like the price is about the same today, ranging from six to nine dollars in most cases.

For Yankees fans who are attending a baptism in Massachusetts, show some respect, too. Do not yell “THEEEEEEEEEE YANKEEZ WIN!” like John Sterling during the ceremony.

Chapter six is entitled “Meeting Emotional Needs.” It contains a fascinating, and honestly fairly accurate, “wheel of emotions” diagram. The author then demonstrates how one emotion unchecked can lead to more serious conditions; for example, pensiveness can lead to sadness (think Ecclesiastes) can lead to grief. He uses examples from fans of the two teams, but this appears to be something that could be helpful for others in understanding emotions.

You get the idea. It is a lot of fun. Some quibbles will never be resolved. For example, who used steroids more? Fans on both sides point out suspicions and evidence: A-Rod probably stands out since Clemens admitted it, but Manny Ramirez has been suspiciously silent on the issue.

When my poem, “Why Did You Keep Pedro In?” was published by the Baseball Almanac, they deleted one of the stanzas which begins. “The Yankees suck steroids like soda.” I understand why they omitted it, but it does reflect my bias.

I recall a friend who grew up in the Boston area complaining in the late sixties about New York Times sports stars. New York City and the Times have such a cultural influence that mediocre players are often touted as great, while they would probably be ignored except that they played in New York. Hey, Tom Tresh was a Major Leaguer and a switch-hitter, but he was no Mickey Mantle, though you might not know it if you just read the Times back then.

I got an early introduction to this. As a young Pittsburgh Pirates fan, I was ecstatic that the Pirates beat the Yankees in the 1960 World Series. I attended game seven with my father, but that is another story. Tell me, though, who was voted the Most Valuable Player in the series? A Yankee! Sportswriters’ bias! Eventually, writers in New York would concede what a terrific player Roberto Clemente was, even though he performed for a “small market” audience.

Bill James in his The Politics of Glory notes that the Baseball Hall of Fame is partly owned by the State of New York. He attributes the election of certain players from New York teams (Yankees, Mets, Dodgers, Giants) to that bias as well. N.B.: I read this book years ago. It has been revised with the title Whatever Happened to the Hall of Fame? Bill James, of course, is the Sabremetrics guru, so we should pay at least some attention to what he has to say.

I apologize if I sounded too serious in the last couple of paragraphs, but I could not help it. I am a Martian, that is how we are. Red Sox Fans Are from Mars, Yankees Fans Are from Uranus, though, is a lot of fun. I confess it might be slightly dated now because since 2010 the Red Sox have won two more titles. They are out of it this year, but, as Red Sox fans always say, wait till next year.

P.S. As a side note, I suspect this year’s ALCS might be a groaner for American League fans. Though the Yankees and Astros both have a good sized fan base, they are currently probably the two most hated teams in the league. Whoever many fans are rooting for—whether the arrogant Yankees or the cheating Astros—they probably have to hold their noses doing it.