Jack Frost. Experiencing Father’s Embrace. Destiny Image, 2002. [References are Kindle locations, not page numbers.]

The popular/infamous/weird television show Lost had an episode titled “All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues.” Most of us do have daddy issues, at least to some extent, even if we are lousy cowboys. If you are willing to admit this, take a look at this book.

Experiencing Father’s Embrace was written for today’s culture. Since the 1950s fathers have been mocked on television, dismissed by feminists, and suspected by Freudians. Still, study after study shows that the presence of a father in a family is the single most important factor in raising mentally and socially healthy children.

Still, we know that fathers are not perfect. Even in a family with a father present, there can be problems. Jack Frost transparently tells us of his own journey as a husband and father. Yes, men are driven and competitive. They can be hard on others as well as themselves. As we mature, many of us have to come to terms with things our fathers said or did (or did not say or do).

Experiencing Father’s Embrace can help us do that. Not only does Frost tell of his own experience: a distant father thanks to divorce, his own competitive drive, a self-righteous view of religion—all contributed to his rough people skills. After he converted to Christianity, he knew right from wrong, but that just made him, if anything, a little harder.

Eventually, though, God began dealing with him and he learned both how to deal with his own lack of a father’s love, and learning about and applying his Heavenly Father’s love in his own life and relationships.

There are three parts to this book. The first describes the problems that many people have relating to fathers. He reminds us that it is the devil, the adversary, who is the accuser, who says we will never measure up. That is not the way of God’s love.

Everything Jesus did on earth, including His sacrificial death on the cross, shows us the heart of the Father—a heart of love and compassion, not one of wrath and judgment. (772)

I may have mentioned before that I had a friend who used yellow highlighters to mark things he was reading. Every now and then he would recommend an article or book by saying, “This one is so good, I just wanted to dip the whole page in a bucket of yellow ink.” That is way this book, at least the first two sections of it, come across. This could bring some healing to most readers—healing both internally and in their relationships.

There are lists of helpful things; hopefully, they do not become overwhelming. Readers can take their time. One entry of about a dozen Biblical affirmations begins by saying “I am God’s happy thought!” God really does have a wonderful plan.

The author’s approach is balanced. He understands that repentance means a change in behavior. Like the younger son in the parable of the prodigal son, we can demand something from God from the perspective of a brat. Still, if we see God as a good heavenly Father, we will begin to have a positive relationship with Him and with others.

Indeed, the second section is a teaching on relationships with both earthly and the heavenly fathers based on the story of the prodigal son. (Luke 15:11-32) We need to see that the story is as much about the father as the son. And it is as much about the older son as the one who ran away. Together, they give us a sense of the Father’s heart and provide plenty of opportunity for self-examination.

The older brother has left the father’s house just as surely as the younger son left, and the father realizes that both of his sons need a homecoming. (1343)

The third section may not be for every reader. Assuming the reader has come with the author through the first two sections and is beginning to accept his own identity with the Heavenly Father in spite of and because of his own father, the third second give some direction on living in a family, especially with a spouse and children. This section may not speak much to the single person, but do not write off the first two sections because of that.

One of the lists in the book describes four kinds of fathers. Most fall into one of the categories. Frost then goes on to help the reader understand and deal with each kind of father. He also gives some step by step helps to resolve certain difficulties. There are prayers to use to help or to guide in praying through certain situations. This book can be a big help to many people. As Socrates noted, the examined life is the one worth living.